KYDZ POP 56!

HEY KIDS! KYDZ POP IS BACK WITH OUR 56TH COMPILATION INCLUDING ALL YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AND TODAY’S HITS MADE BY KIDS FOR KIDS. WOW! WHIZZO! BLAMO! AND HEY ALL YOU PARENTS, I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING: 'AREN’T THESE SONGS UNSUITABLE FOR MINORS?' FUCK YEAH, YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! THAT’S WHY EVERY KYDZ POP SONG IS SANITIZED FOR KID USE. WOWOWOWOWOWOWOW

HEAR HITS LIKE -

“Black Barbie” by Nicki Minaj

That boy is a real cookie eata’

“Mask Off” by Future

Juicy Juice, yeah I’m drinkin’ Juicy Juice

“Swalla” by Jason Derulo

Goose! Duck-duck-duck-duck

“Formation” by Beyoncé

When he does the chores, I take his friends to McDonald’s.

“That’s What I Like” by Bruno Mars

I got a pillow fort that’s happenin’

Tea cups and some Nesquick

You an' yo’ doll invited.

BUT WAIT KIDS THAT’S NOT ALL! WE GOT SO MANY HUMPY-THUMPY-DIP-DOO-DA COOLIO HITS, ANYONE WHO DOESN’T HAVE THIS CD IS A FUCKIN’ NERD. WALK TO CLASS SINGING MORE STERILIZED HITS THAN PUTTING YOUR BABYMAKERS INTO A MICROWAVE.

“Too Good” by Drake

I don’t know how to play this game.

Let’s not lose all the pieces when we put ‘em away.

“It’s a Vibe” by 2 Chainz

Your ice cream meltin’

Slippin’, meltin’ off the cone

It's a vibe

Get napkins

“Love on the Brain” by Rihanna

My. jump. rope. is. stuck.

and it’s. tangled. real. tight.

and I juust waaanna skiiip.

Must be P.E. on the brain.

“Despacito” by Luis Fonsi and Daddy Yankee Featuring Justin Bieber

We gotta do some school shoppin’ to buy new duds.

Mom, don’t buy that underwear it’s uncool.

Despacito.

“Wild Thoughts” by DJ Khaled

Ay, uh-huh, uh-huh

Ayy, there’s pizza in the lunchroom today It’s got kids goin’ crazy, crazy I bought milk for a dollar Drink it till I have lactose problems

BUT WAIT THAT’S NOT ALL! ACT NOW AND GET A SECOND CD FOR FREE! THAT’S RIGHT YOU LIL’ FUCKERS. GET TWO EXACT SAME CDS FOR THE PRICE OF ONE. GIVE THE OTHER ONE AS A GIFT AT A BIRTHDAY PARTY, BAR AND BAH FITZMITZVAH, QUINCENAREOS, FIRST COMMUNES OR WHEREVER THE FUCK YOU GO. LISTEN ALL DAY EVERYDAY. DRIVE YOUR PARENTS FUCKIN’ INSANE AS THEY HAVE TO LISTEN TO THE SONGS THEY KNOW GET METAPHORICALLY STRIPPED AND FUCKED UP THE ASS, BUT IT’S ALL IN GOOD SELF-RIGHTEOUS FUN BECAUSE WE THE RECORD LABEL WANNA SAVE YOU FROM YOURSELVES AND LIE THAT THERE IS NO FUN TO BE HAD WITH YOUR EROGENOUS ZONES. WHIPSY-SKIPSY-GOBBLE-GOO! ENJOY KIDS!